By M. Kotch

Loss. The word captures such a range of intense emotions from sadness and anger to bewilderment to loneliness and detachment. A feeling of numbness can occur, and protecting yourself from these strong feelings can make things a little easier at first, but it can only sustain you for so long.

Moving forward is easier said than done. And while this list does not provide all the answers, it will hopefully help you, or someone you love, take those first few steps toward healing.

Reading: For many of us, the private and quiet act of reading provides solace in countless ways. The good news is your local bookstore or favorite Web site offers a wide range of books; specific titles are available for just about anyone, including those dealing with the loss of a parent, child, spouse or sibling. It may feel as if you’re the only person who is feeling the way that you do, but rest assured that you are not alone. Here is a list of popular titles:

• Dealing with the loss of a child: “The Worst Loss: How Families Heal From the Death of a Child” by Barbara D. Rosof
• Losing a spouse: “Finding Your Way After Your Spouse Dies” by Marta Felber
• Dealing with a loved one’s suicide: “No Time to Say Goodbye: Surviving the Suicide of a Loved One” by Carla Fine
• Losing a parent: “When Parents Die: A Guide for Adults”

Exercise: According to the Mayo Clinic, a growing volume of research shows that consistent physical activity improves mental health, especially symptoms of depression or anxiety. No one is asking you to prepare for a marathon during your time of grief, in fact, 30 minutes of walking anywhere from three to five times a week is enough to improve symptoms. If that doesn’t appeal to you, try a yoga class or DVD at home. Anything that forces you out of your own head will give your mind some peace and allow your body to relax.

Counseling: Seeking professional help for grief and sadness is not a sign of weakness. Thanks to a better understanding of mental health and growing area of expertise amongst psychologists, therapists, social workers and grief counselors, real help is out there—you only have to ask. Where can you start? Make an appointment with your primary care physician and ask him or her to recommend someone to speak with. These days, many insurance companies cover such visits with a mental professional. Admitting that you need help is neither self-indulgent nor a sign of failing; working through your sadness will help you in your daily life more than you can imagine.

Friends: Your friends and family can provide the ultimate comfort. But if you need more consoling, try making virtual friends, the kind afforded thanks to the abundance of helpful message boards and forums that deal with this particular subject. After all, sometimes you really need the advice or honest words of someone who has already experienced what you are feeling now. Knowing that someone else has lived through—and survived—a similar situation to yours can provide that glimmer of hope that you are working toward.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, June 30th, 2009 at 2:52 pm and is filed under Support. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.