5 reasons not to have a traditional funeral
by Emily S. Gerson
A funeral can be a very sad and even boring event. Most people don’t bother to think outside the box and add any personality to their funeral plans; they just follow the tradition of their culture. Planning a non-traditional funeral that celebrates your life and uniqueness not only creates a memorable and positive event for your loved ones, but saves you money. Here a re the five major reasons why you should not have a traditional funeral.
1. There are no rules – make your own
For non-religious people, having a funeral ceremony in a place of worship with prayers and clergy seems as contrived as it does insincere. If funerals have always creeped you out, forgo having a viewing at yours. If burial in a coffin seems unnatural to you, opt for a green burial that will put you closer to the earth. Essentially, having a non-traditional funeral means you get to call all the shots and do what makes you comfortable. You get to throw out the traditional rules and plan your funeral the way you want it.
2. You can’t afford one
Traditional funerals can be extremely expensive. Costs include renting a funeral home, embalming, equipment and staff for a graveside service, transportation services for the remains, a limousine for the family, the casket, the cemetery plot or crypt, flowers, obituary notices, officiating clergy, and more. According to the Federal Trade Commission, the average traditional funeral costs $6,000, though some exceed $10,000. If you can’t stomach the thought of you or your family spending that kind of money to bury you, opt for a non-traditional funeral. Consider a green burial or cremation, which are much less expensive, especially since embalming is not necessary with either. Create a free online tribute instead of expensive newspaper announcements. Eschew flowers and ask for a donation to your favorite charity instead.
3. You want something more meaningful
Traditional funerals don’t allow much room for creativity. Every person is unique, so why not let your funeral reflect your personality and spirit while you were alive? A traditional funeral tends to be somber, but a non-traditional funeral can shift the focus to a positive celebration your life. Sure, you can get a KISS casket, but you don’t have to go that far. Just play an active role in the planning of the funeral to make it suits who you were when you were alive. One example is to ask to be cremated and then have your family spread your ashes in your favorite place. A non-traditional funeral allows you to customize your funeral to your liking, which will give the ceremony much more significance and meaning to both you and your loved ones.
4. You want your life to end with an exclamation mark, not a period
It’s a sad fact, but funerals are common, especially as you grow older. Most funerals are traditional and done exactly the same way, so none really stand out or provide a positive or memorable experience. Why not have a non-traditional funeral service and turn it into a unique experience that your friends and family can look back on with warm memories? Funerals are very difficult for those behind, but a thoughtful funeral customized to your wishes will make it a better experience for your loved ones, and will give them a positive association with your passing. Have your family play a slideshow of pictures from you throughout life. Suggest a theme that aligns with one of your passions. Ask that a good friend or family member (or several) give a eulogy instead of clergy member who didn’t know you. Request that your favorite rock song be played instead of organ music. A non-traditional funeral will be full of your personality and will be a memorable experience for the attendees.
5. You admire an alternative culture or burial rites from another religion
Your religion or culture likely has one type of traditional funeral that almost everyone receives. However, that doesn’t mean you need to follow those traditions; remember, this is your funeral. If there are burial rights from another culture or religion that resonate with you, feel free to incorporate them into the celebration of your life. If you are passionate about saving the environment, forgo a traditional burial and have a green funeral, which will prevent embalming chemicals from seeping into the ground and put you in a biodegradable shroud or coffin. If you’ve been raised to think you need a burial but are intrigued by cremation, do that instead. There is less environmental impact, and your ashes can be shared amongst those who love you or spread in a place (or multiple places) that are special to you. In the Buddhist culture, a three-day vigil is held over the deceased. If your religion doesn’t call for that but that idea comforts you, request that it be a part of your funeral rites. Don’t be afraid to do some research to find about traditions in different cultures that may fit better with your needs than those in your own culture.
