Human instincts
A relative of mine was diagnosed with a terminal illness a couple of years ago. Most people with this form of cancer do not survive beyond five years. But, this one’s a fighter. Despite very aggressive treatments – radiation, chemo – and the debilitating effects thereof, she continues to go on camping trips and writes/plays songs on her guitar. Why should the threat of an imminent death prevent you from living the most of your life?
And yet, when I was told that she recently started using an online dating service, I was shocked. I thought: Why go through the effort of meeting someone new? Why invest the time? What is the point? Now that I’ve had some time to reflect, I suppose I see the situation more clearly.
First, people are different. I probably would keep to myself. Watching a movie or eating dinner alone has never been a problem for me. I rather like personal time. But, then there are folks who want and need to be around people.
Second, there is always hope. What if the doctors are wrong? Miracles happen. And even if a miracle does not occur, perhaps she could find love. Maybe her soulmate awaits.
Finally, there is human nature. How many of our actions are driven purely by instinct? To breathe, to seek out food, shelter and companionship. Art Buchwald, in one of his last columns – it may have been his very last – talked about wanting ice cream and the regret that he cut out sweets towards the end of his life, simply to live longer. Maybe it’s trite to compare wanting ice cream with wanting love, but human beings crave things. To love (and be loved) is probably one of the most basic human instincts there is.
